i would say, "it's about frackin' time..."

...but that wouldn't be very dignified or At Peace of me, would it?

screw it.

it's about frackin' time! i got my business loan today, finally. the lady was nice, except for about a half hour when she wouldn't stop pushing me and i very nearly bit her head off. i was feeling quite munchy at the time, too, and almost laid it out for her.

luckily, i didn't have to.

so i have my business loan. now comes the advertising campaign of doom.

also, first thing i did with that loan money was take my rumbly-bumbly to the vet. ever since i brought him home, he's been a sniffly li'l kid. the sniffles, sneezing (sometimes over two dozen sneezes in a row, and yes, i've counted), wheezy and raspy breathing, swollen and runny eyes...he's been a mess. i thought it was a cold or allergies, so i took him to the vet and had his shots taken care of, and got him tested for feline leukemia.

thank the goddess it wasn't that!

then the money ran out, and i was giving him reiki and putting airborne in the kitty fountain until i could do something. finally, this loan.

it's not allergies, which i was convinced it was considering the flare-ups. the vet said it was herpes simplex, and most kitties are exposed and are carriers. my poor baby is just one of the lucky ones to manifest symptoms. he'll always have it, but now i have meds and a plan of action to manage this and keep him comfortable. and if it gets bad to the point where i just can't stand how uncomfortable he is (which won't be difficult to do, since i really am a fussy mother on the inside) i can pop on in and have them give him a cortisone shot.

thank the gods i have answers. i hate not knowing what's going on, and watching him suffer.

all this means now is that rumblestrut's going to be the kid with the chronic health problem that gets totally fussed over and lavished upon because of it.

i have No Problem with this.

he's my darling rumbly-bumbly, my strapping, nearly-thirteen-pound bruiser who's as graceful as a drunk elephant. oh, my kitty-poo, i love you.

this week in a post

shortly after noon today, i will be in the air headed to ft. lauderdale for a two-day business and online marketing conference.

lemme tell you, the planning and monetary demands of this trip have been monumentally craptastic. we're talking "delena wants to set her hair on fire" caliber.

*ks* said, "well, if you think about it, the planning and the events leading up to this have been a disaster...but it's the being there that you wanted. so forget about all this crap, and just enjoy being there." y'know, he had a point. "you're going to go there and enjoy the beach," he went on, "and you're going to learn some fantastic things about marketing that you can then bring home and implement. so enjoy it."

i think i'll try me a bit of that. i've brought *ds*'s laptop with me (to her everlasting benevolence, i will sing her praises to the last turning of the earth), and have *ks*'s digi-cam with me, so when i figure it out, there will be pictures. knowing me, there will probably be a pathetically huge amount of pictures.

sheesh, i still haven't posted about my camping trip. although suffice it to say, if i wasn't on this loaner linux box (while *mj* tries to repair my dead pc), i prolly would've already touched up a few pics and posted them up here. but as i'm not on a windows machine but am instead using linux-based programs, i don't have photoshop. there's a linux-friendly version, but...it's not photoshop.

and i can never sleep before a flight. it's seven minutes 'till 05:00 as i write this, and i'm still awake waiting for my yoga pants to come out of the dryer. i am determined to wear jammies on the flight. if i'm gonna be sitting for over seven hours either in a tin can with wings, or in a terminal with a gajillion other people, i'm going to be comfy in a white hanes t-shirt and jammy pants, dammit.

in fact, i refuse to take any other shoes but my flip-flops. marvel and revel in the adorable orange-painted toes that are mine, mwa ha ha!

we spent tonight de-flea-ing the house. rumblestrut, my darling rumbly-bumbly, has demonstrated an extreme sensitivity to fleas that a stupid-ass neighbor brought with her and set loose upon our cat-filled house. rumbles, as it turns out, has severe allergies, and we found a pinkie-tip-sized crater of a cold sore on his lip, which is a response to fleas.

grr.

no, seriously. grr, dammit.

so we sprayed them, flea-bathed them, and sprayed the shit out of the apartment with this really neat, eucalyptus-tea-tree-smelling stuff that's pleasant...until about an hour later when it's just a trifle overpowering. hours later, the kitties are still traumatized from their horrendous baths, but then...they're not over-grooming and going crazy from flea bitey itchiness anymore, either.

but i still have to take rumbles to the vet, probably for cortisone shots and most likely an allergy regimen, as well. after how awful i feel, having totally failed him as a kitty mama, that boy will get whatever he needs, and he'll never want for anything ever again.

on the flip side, i think i feel stronger about *cr* than i did the last time i posted about him. i'm still letting him steer and am keeping this totally pressure-free. if it turns into a real something, great. and if it doesn't, then that's great, too.

and as part of my lessons to myself about learning to let go, i finally gave in to my curiosity and started playing World of Warcraft. and i like it.

so totally craptastic week. and somehow i survived. now i just gotta get through the weekend.

daily deelite

after the whopping day i had yesterday, i'm chock full of even more gratitude! and what's amazing that i've discovered is that the more i practice gratitude, the more i realize my own frame of mind is my choice in any circumstance (moreso than my stoicism, which was merely cover-up on a pimple). and in any circumstance, even the lameass ones i had yesterday at work, there was gratitude to be found...

1. i'm grateful for my family, for good food, laughter, and my rockin' siblings. i'm grateful for the blessings i have when i sit down around a table filled with family, the sense of belonging, and the comfy atmosphere conducive to the ribald, raucous, and off-color jokes that were running a mile a minute last night.

2. i'm grateful that my family is growing! i got to meet my future brother-in-law last night, and he's actually pretty great. when a guy can catch even my more obscure jokes, i have to think, "yeah, this guy's all right."

3. i'm grateful that i have other opportunities in my life and i'm not chained to my job at the salon. instead of letting the stupid bureaucratic nonsense get me down and oppress me, i'm using it as a springboard of inspiration. what was once a lovely opportunity to brighter horizons, independence, and a sense of self has become a toxic relationship. and we all know what delena does with toxic relationships...

in the immortal words of my dad, "give 'em the bum's rush, honey!"

4. i'm grateful for laughter. i must say that i don't think i've laughed so much or so thoroughly in a while than i have in this last week. my life has achieved a kind of high simply on laughter and joy. i see freedom, purpose, and a real chance for phenominal change. i see myself growing in new and incredible ways, and i can feel those changes happening inside of myself even as i write this. my Funk-colored glasses effing rock!

5. i'm grateful for the kitties. i wake up and open my door, and i'm greeted by eight round eyes and four perky tails, and four sleek bodies rubbing up on my legs and trying very, very hard to trip me up. i'm greeted by squeaks, mews, trills, chitters, and purrs. "oh," i say in my sleepy voice, "g'morning rumbles, baby. you want da pettin's? aww, there's my boy..." and i scratch under his chin. invariably, here comes liam the black slinky. "okay, liam. you get da pettin's, too, all cowlicky and trying to play 'dead kitty' and trip me, thanks." of course, voodoo's been mrowling the whole time since hearing my door open. "okay, voodoo. you get luvins. there. oh yes, thank you, i needed a butt in my face. start my day off right." and the kitten, angel, gives me either her silent mew or the long, drawn-out "squeeee!" and it's soooo pathetic i have to pet her. "okay, kitten, luv luv luv, purr purr purr. yes, chew my fingers. really, i didn't need them today. oh yes, and don't forget to attack my toes. vicious killer, oooh i'm scared." all of this is delivered in my monotone, i-just-woke-up, throaty sleepy voice. but inside, i'm all warm and fuzzy from so much kitty luv.

rock the kitty luv!

sacred life sunday

my beloved kitten, Rumblestrut, whom i saved on snowy christmas
and introduced to the good life: catnip mousies, wholesome food,
clean water, warmth, luvins, a soft bed,
and an endless array of things to get into.

i had tried to get a pic of him napping on the kitty tree,
but of course he pouts because i killed the kitty zen.
delena the zen-slayer.
rumblestrut the guilt-tripper.

he helps me find my inner kitty...

the demon children

so word had gotten around at work that delena was looking to adopt a couple of kitties. of course, it's also old news that delena is moving, and there's a bit of financial hardship because of it. hence, the not being able to adopt the kitties i wanted from our cat adoption center inside our store.

of course, one of the myriad girls in my salon was trying to find homes for kittens her horny-ass cat had given birth to a couple of months ago. so, naturally, she offered me kittens.

now, i had not wanted kittens. and i had originally not wanted two felines to begin with. however, *m* had seen a kitty at the adoption center that totally suckered him, and we just started operating under the assumption that we would be living with four felines in our house.

so this girl from my salon brings by these two little sisters for me to check out. of course, she just had to say they were inseparable at home, always playing with each other and that they look for each other if one's not in the same room with the other. *rolls eyes and sighs* so, naturally, i couldn't be Big Bad Delena and rip the two sisters apart only to toss one into the wild that is my apartment, let her get used to it for a month, and then rip her away only to toss her in with *m*'s anti-social freakazoid cat loki, and his dowager empress bitch, her highness ashlee.
what? i'm not that cruel...

so i took them both home.

...i said i wasn't cruel. i never said i wasn't a sucker.

of course our mafia twins, andrew and harley, were all goose-eyed and puffed up. like they'd never seen a kitten before. hell, it wasn't too long ago that they were the runts of the house. glanze, *mj*'s cat, got all insecure and kept trailing around her daddy. "daddy, daddy. look at me, i'm cuuute. daddy. daddy! you still love me, right? daddy. ...daddy...?" and mookie, our king of the crow's nest, was just like, "*sniff, sniff* hmm, too small to play with, too small to annoy me. whatever."

i'm waiting for them to tell me their names, but after one night of games such as, "FEET ARE EVIL! THE FEET MUST DIIIIIIE!" and "DEATH FROM ABOVE!!!" *plop on delena's sleeping head from the headboard* i'm thinking that the tri-color sister will be dubbed "Ling," short for "Chitterling," which is, so i am told, a Minor Demon of Annoyance. don't let her cuteness fool you. she's evil.





i still don't know what ling's sister's name is, although if she keeps up as she is, she might very well be "Azrael," if not "Andariel." greeeat...both my fuzzy feline children will be named after demons.



heh. demon children...

what's that word again?

from the oxford-delena dictionary

righteous indignation
n.
1. retribution, retributive justice, anger, and contempt combined with a feeling that it is one's right to feel that way
2. anger without guilt

enraged
adj.
1. marked by extreme anger

heartbroken
adj.
1. crushed with sorrow or grief

speechless
adj.
1. temporarily deprived of speech by strong emotion, etc.

all of them, dammit. there simply are no words.

man is a sick, cruel son of a bitch.

i hate people. this is well known. anyone that listens to me talk --or reads my blogs-- about customer service and working in that particular midden heap knows how i feel about the raging droves of ignorant and self-centered humanity. humans can be disgusting creatures.

*cc* just got a phone call from her friend that his wife was driving on the road and saw a bag of something tossed out the car window. it was then run over by a semi.

a kitten was thrown from the sack.

she pulled over and rescued the poor little orphan. the rest of his brothers and sisters were killed when the semi ran over them. his teeth are barely growing in, so he's probably not even fully weaned yet, and someone had the fan-fucking-tastic idea to bag 'em all up and toss them into traffic from a moving vehicle!

no thought about the animal shelter. no thought about neighbors who might want an adorable, playful little kitten. noooo, let's just throw them under the wheel of an eighteen wheeler, get rid of the whole problem!

she was so concerned about saving the survivor that she couldn't get a good look at the license plate of the cat killer and animal hater. gods-damned son of a syphillis-ridden whore. i hope he contracts a historical case of incurable anal seepage! i hope he goes home to find his wife in bed with his redneck best friend, his son's a crack-addict taking it up the ass for money, his daughter's doing it with the neighbor's dog on film, and someone's stolen his identity online and racked up $4000 in phone sex calls and two first class tickets from JFK to london-heathrow. i wish people could experience the exact same pain and cruelty they inflict on animals. then they'd know how it feels and how horrible it is!

i wish i could say that i instantly pray for the murderous assholes for their crimes against Life, but i'm not exactly fully immersed in pronoia just yet. my sense of helplessness, dismay, and frustration oftentimes get the better of me and i just want them to burn.

sick motherfucker. i hate humans!

i hate their cruelty and manifest destiny. i hate their prejudice and god complex, their top-of-the-foodchain ego and blind adherence to sexist dogma over practical reason. i hate their "me first" attitude and "now" generation that's really not a "new" thing at all. i hate their primitive religious wars and barbaric might-makes-right mentality. i hate corporate takeovers and political upheavals. i hate a race that produces environments that makes it totally acceptable for someone to toss a bag of brand new, innocent lives under the wheels of a semi truck.

it's murder, cruelty, and abomination of the highest order.

is there anyone in the portland-salem-vancouver area that can and would like to adopt a very young kitten tragically orphaned? email me (my email is available through my profile, the link's to the right), or leave a comment with your email address and i'll get back to you.

thursday thirteen #2

Thirteen Things That Are Wonderful About Kitties


1. They make sure we never take ourselves too seriously

2. By strategically placing themselves in high-traffic areas, they make sure our sense of balance and reflexes are razor sharp

3. They maintain our hunter-gatherer skills by stealing important items (e.g. car keys, remote controls, socks) and hiding them in cat-only accessible places in the house

4. They magnanimously allow us to bask in the wonderful kittiness that is them

5. They promote us to attain higher and more enlightened versions of ourselves by pointing out every time we're stupid

6. Leading by example, they remind us that no matter how caught up in our lives we are, there's always room for a nap

7. They advise to groom often, especially when caught in the act of losing your cat cool. That way, it looks deliberate

8. Sneaking behind the couch and attacking someone's ankles is a fun way to say, "I love you!"

9. They remind us to take time to sit somewhere up high and just watch the world. It's amazing what you might see.

10. They encourage you to keep your pride's territory clean by regularly shedding and coughing up hairballs on the area in question

11. They're always honest, and never put up with company they don't want to, complete with hissing and the occasional scratch.

12. The kitty box is an eternal reminder to regularly clean out the crap in your life.

13. The kitty purr is a sure sign kitty zen is within reach. Sit back, and embrace your inner kitty

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