the variety-pak of life

there's so much going on inside my head right now, and honestly i don't know where to begin. life just does that funny, meandering, mixed-up thing it does, and suddenly i'm sitting here trying to blog and wondering where to begin.

life has in no way whatsoever settled into anything remotely resembling a routine. i find i miss routine. just thinking about the lack of routine makes my head hurt and i wanna lie down. then again, that could also be from the gluten attack i had on friday night that laid me up until pretty much today. careful avoidance of gluten has made me extremely susceptible to even small amounts now, and wow. it felt like i'd just been kicked by an elephant.

work is going pretty well. as a pest inspector, i'm expected to squeeze myself into some pretty icky places beneath houses, and in attics. i find it fun, actually, and i enjoy people's reactions when they see that i --a cute, smiling, cheerful li'l chica-- is gonna go dungeon delving in their crawl space. it's kinda fun. and i'm starting to really get to know the technicians that follow after me to perform the actual services that i've sold our customers. i like to leave little things for them, like gift cards to mc menamin's, etc. just to say thank you for taking care of these people and backing up my word. we all work together, y'know? but it's nice when i know that these wonderful guys got my back. i'm starting to get further into the business where the teenie details that i don't know are bubbling up, and they look out for me. so i show my appreciation.

school is still...hmm. i don't know where i'm headed with that just yet. i got back my transfer results from the Admissions office regarding the classes i had taken years ago in cali. now, instead of being 66 credits until my degree, i only have 30 to go. and i still have my 4.0; i'm a little relieved. of course, this rather derails my plans for which courses i was going to take, so now i have to sit down with my councillor again and re-plan everything. and i still don't know if i'm going to take a fall course yet. spring semester threw me for such a loop, and now i admit that there's so much dread it turns my stomach whenever i think of enrolling.

*mj*, eager darling that he is, sat down with me last night to start talking about things like the menu for samhain. it might be early, but i suppose he's like me in that he wants to be as prepared as possible. i can appreciate that. i told him that what i really wanted was a cake. i haven't done any baking since the "yay, i can't eat guten!" news, and i really, really miss baked goods. you know how long it's been since i've had a brownie?! and plain ol' yellow cake with chocolate frosting, i miss it. no real baking gets done during the summer, but even at the stores i can't eat anything there. i keep thinking of that little place on the east side that apparently makes a phenomenal gluten-free chocolate cake...and i'm wondering if it's worth the drive...

so yeah. just a yellow cake, homemade chocolate buttercream frosting. that would make halloween such a special holiday for me. kinda funny.

and my li'l sister *t* is coming up on monday! i'm so excited sometimes it feels like i'm going to burst apart. my li'l sis is something else, i swear. i tell everyone that i was the rough draft, and ten years later the finished product was born. she's everything cool that i am, only to the nth degree, plus she's got so much else going for her. she's so awesomely awesome! and even more, i can be myself around her in a way that i really can't anywhere else except with her and my li'l bro *aj*. we just get all of our jokes (hell, a lot of them we invented together), and she gets my subtleties like no one else. she's been there for me through...well, my entire life, and she just knows those things for which there are no words. those things that help make me who i am that can't really be explained but influence me nonetheless. she gets me.

when she visits, people up here see us together, then look at me...nod...and say, "Now i get it!" see? it's not just me! and she's the only one that i can laugh 'till i die with. you know when you're laughing so hard you're flopped out on the floor, tears streaming down your face, with absolutely no more breath for any sound at all...but you can't stop laughing to take a breath? yeah, that's us.

a part of me relaxes when she's around. hell, we grew up together; no such thing as a mystery between us. but also, i just really farkin' adore her.