GRATITUDE [grat.i.tude]: Big time buzzword during spiritual awakening phase of planetary evolution, yet often misunderstood.
When you think thoughts of "thanks," Delena, it's exactly the same as thinking thoughts of having received. And, as is true of all thoughts on the plane of manifestation, they must immediately strive to manifest into your time-space life.
Yet, the only way there can be a manifestation of such thoughts is if you do actually physically receive. And the only way you can actually physically receive is if all of the players and circumstances of your life are literally shifted around and manipulated, without you or them even knowing what's going on, so that you will be predisposed to the right ideas, hunches, connections, and introductions that will deliver you smack into the middle of such manifestations.
And it's all perfectly legal,
what's really funny is that i've been thinking along these lines for the last few weeks. and not even really in my own life, but a friend's. sometimes i get egotistical and think that --in some way-- all that i've gone through, the work and pain and growth, has been so that i could be the right person in the right place at the right time to help him go, "hey, yeah!"
then i get over myself and realize that, even more importantly, events and people and things were moving around so that i was the right person in the right place at the right time...to receive yet more instruction and an opportunity for growth.
and like everything else in my life, i've been peeling away the outer layers of some things and refining my wants. like those things that have anything to do with careerlovemarriagechildren. it was always a want. thank the gods it's not a Need. i'm headed into the Decade of Bombastic Dee-liciousness and i'm catching this glimpse of just how wonderful i'm going to be.
i. me. solamente yo, ya 'ueno. just me. y'know, the original definition of "virgin" was a woman who was complete unto herself. understood in such a light, virgins were held to be sacred, a walking, talking, living, breathing holy thing. i suppose you could say i've never truly been virgin. twenty-one years since the Baseball Bat Incident...and it's about time i gently took back that part of myself. i'm fine by myself, as myself, and i don't Need anybody.
it's so liberating.
i can Be Myself, the whole whoppalicious, fan-Funky-tastic unfettered me. i'm done with people who say i'm too big for them, too much to handle. you'll never again see me in the company of anyone who squishes me. hell, i don't even wear jeans that make me have to suck it in. and dude, i can feel it: more rapidly every day, the old, outer layers are just peeling away. everything up until this point has just been practice. and you know what they say about practice and perfection.
and i think...what if events have been moving around me, people have been dancing beside me, so that other events which have been years in the making can finally come to pass? it fills me with a quivering eagerness that has me all but bursting with anticipation. i can't wait for tomorrow. i can't wait for next week, next month, next year... and time travel is preposterous only because of this:
we are right now living the events that are setting the stage for the future! so...in essence...today we are predicting our own futures! that's so farking COOL! we're the most kickass prognosticators...with all the power of space and time flowing through us with each breath we take. because each breath takes us forward, each action forms consequences which flow through us and through time...and will return to us in the form of "manifestation," as the Universe calls it.
it's so abso-fraggin'-lutely, mind-blowingly awesome. i positively quiver in eager anticipation. it's like wondering what surprises i have in store for myself. all i know is that all my previous work is manifesting as the Real Thing now.