CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Happy Valentine Daze, Capricorn! The astrological omens suggest that you should liberate your wild heart from its hiding place, maybe even experiment with extravagant expressions of love. To get yourself worked up into a proper state of fertile agitation, read aloud from Pablo Neruda's book *100 Love Sonnets* (translated by Stephen Tapscott), starting with "Love Sonnet XI": "I crave your mouth, your voice, your hair. Silent and starving, I prowl through the streets. Bread does not nourish me, dawn disrupts me, all day_I hunt for the liquid measure of your steps . . . [I] hunger for the pale stones of your fingernails,_I want to eat your skin like a whole almond . . . I want to eat the fleeting shade of your lashes. And I pace around hungry, sniffing the twilight, hunting for you, for your hot heart, like a puma in the barrens . . . ."

mr. brezsny, i love you...but FUCK NO and GET BENT, mr. brezsny. my "wild heart," as you accurately called it, has been indelibly cured of its ridiculous obsession with romantic love.

but don't worry. i'll love you next week.

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