sepuku sunday

there's junkmail tuesday, fucktard friday, grocery run monday, and now sepuku sunday.

after two sundays of utter suckage at work, i was braced for what i'd tentatively called "sepuku sunday," because the suckage is so hard that honorable suicide actually starts to look good. *nod*

but of course, being me, i gave it the benefit of the doubt. i walked into work with a smile on my face like i always do. i'd even been able to sleep in today until 07:30 because i didn't have to be in until 10:00. on my way to the bathroom i ran into the manager lady.

me: "guten morgen!"
her: "good morning. oh hey! you're gonna love this, delena. *sL* called in today."
me: "oh joy of joys. huzzah for sepuku sunday!"

she laughed. when i got to the parlor, another of the groomers said, "oh, you're gonna love this!" (yeah, almost the same words as the manager lady." "*sL* called in sick today."

yup! i'd already heard, i said. "gotta love sepuku sunday." nobody got it this time, however.

it actually wasn't that bad of a day. i had an hour and a half of down time because i was smart and didn't allow any time slots to be available. i did my dogs, plus two of the sick girl's dogs, plus five extras (and one last minute walk-in) for a whopping total of fifteen, ALL of which went out at least ninety minutes early.

oh yeah, i rock.

HOWEVER, and this is a big, fat, fucking HOWEVER--

one of the gods-be-damned dogs gave me poison oak!!!!!

poison oak!!

it started out as a small little ring of raised, red, burning bumps. one of the floor managers asked me if i was okay, and i pointed to it and asked, "does this look like ringworm to you?" she shrugged. one of the groomers overheard and said, "did you say 'ringworm'?" so i showed her, too. she shrugged. i showed the manager, and by then it had spread four inches up and two inches across and was burning constantly. she also shrugged.

i thought i was just chafing, because sometimes it burned and pulled like that. so i rubbed lotion on it. *rolls eyes*

by the time i got home, it had completely embraced my right forearm and was working its way up and around my left forearm. i went home and showed *cc*, asked her if it was just chafing, or a rash. when in doubt, ask the military medic.

her: "looks like an allergic reaction to something, dear."
me: "shit. i knew it."
her: "did you use any new soaps or anything?"
me: "well, i had to flea shampoo two dogs, which can do this to my skin, but it was already pretty bad by then. it started after i bathed this one dog. this one obnoxious, filthy, filthy dog."
her: *nodding* "it was prolly running around in the foliage and you got the oils on you."
me: "shit."

so i got to pour bleach all over my arms --which burned like a brisket in the seven hells-- and then rinse well with cold water, popped a couple antihistimenes, and slathered my now scald-red, swollen forearms with cortisone cream.

then i took my ass to red robin and had a boca mushroom burger, fries, and a roy rogers because i deserved comfort food, dammit.

oh yeah, gotta love sepuku sundays.


Azzy said...

Omg! I feel for you girl because ever since I hit menopause I've been getting one rash after another especially when the weather starts to warm up. And rashes are a royal pain in the ass!!

I'm glad you took the edge off things with a little comfort food. Just reading that made me hungry so I'm going to go and pig out on something now. :p Hope you feel better today. *huggles*

Anonymous said...

Ahhhh...there's nothing like a Sunday evening after a day's work,
relaxing and pouring bleach on your skin.
That is hideous!!!! And soooooo painful sounding.
I don't know how you do it. Working Sundays SUCKS even under the best of conditions!
And now this!
Ohhhh...do take care, and I hope you're feeling like less of the "hideous sun demon" (horror movie).

Ravyn said...

Oh god baby. *hugs* You poor dear, don't you hate it when no one thinks to say something like oh I don't know how about 'I don't know where he's been, but we went hiking...' even if they were lying about the horrendeous condition of their dog it would be better than having no clue at all. I hope things get better swiftly. I'm lucky I've never come across poison oak and I have NO intentions of doing so...especially after that...colorful description.

Anonymous said...

sorry for your sucky day, love. now my having to go to the in-law's yesterday doesn't seem so bad after all. lol. how's the rash looking today?

anywaze, i hope today was better. it'd almost have to be, huh? take care, mmmmkay?


Anonymous said...

Ok, I'm back. I didn't think my earlier comment was compassionate enough. (((((big hugs & cold compresses))))
I can't imagine the pain....shudder.
And the blatent disregard some customers have! Do you think they knew about the dog's whereabouts?
I think YOU should call in sick tomorrow!
Take care.

Anonymous said...

I left a comment last night and for some reason it didn't take. *rolls eyes*
Basically I gave some *big hugs* and permission to eat all of the comfort food you need.

Jane said...

OMG...that does SUCK about the poison oak!! I remember working on Sundays years ago. I was a hostess in a Holiday Inn Restaurant. Sometimes, I had been out the entire night with no sleep. When my shift came, I was rediculously tired by Noon.

mich said...

Now that does suck ... but everyone else has already said that ... I hope you're planning on writing a book, because the way you phrase your stories is truly magic!