The very feelings you're now feeling, Delena, the good, the bad, and the confused, are in large part why you chose this lifetime: To simply feel them.
Let's get this party started,
wow. so my first reaction is to say, "wow, stupid move on my part." all these feelings are pretty lame and getting in my way.
on the other hand, it's those feelings --all of them-- that affirm the whole feeling of being alive. some experiences you can only have when you are existing in a linear, solid incarnation.
and feeling them challenge a person to grow to a newer, higher order of functioning, meaning the threshold gets pushed higher and you can feel more, think more, do more, and be more.
so wow. my second, more thoughtful reaction is to go, "wow, go me."
i still want this chaos part to be over now, tho.