this is how cool my sheree is.
after (finally) getting super-mega-awesome sleep after my camping weekend (there will be a post dedicated to the trip, i promise) i started checking all my email and blogs (Google Reader had a whopping 33 posts for me...wow) and myspace. there were three letters waiting for me from my pookielicious, and she totally rocks. i love her words and the way she has with them.
So I read Jonathan Livingston Seagull, fuckin awesome book...
there's a couple lines in it, i included them in a blog. they really kinda spoke to my soul....it's an idea i learned from you but maybe you could stand to hear it back but in different words.....the names have been changed to protect the innocent....
"You need to keep finding yourself, a little more each day, that real, unlimited Delena. She's your instructor. You need to understand her and to practice her." Don't believe what your eyes are telling you. All they show is limitation. Look with your understanding, find out what you already know, and you'll see the way to fly.
see? isn't she just awesome? there's the universe giving me exactly what i need exactly when i need it. i went out this weekend looking for a way to let go, a way out of the unFunk, and i am showered with ways, things to remember, and reminders of just how much i am LURVED!
i wasn't practicing the real Delena Unlimited. i'd lost touch with Delena of the Funkywild in striving to be what someone else expected and was pushing me to be. all i was feeling was my failure. i told him to back off and he was offended, and i was surprisingly angry at that. here i was protecting myself and he was offended? jackass...
my intuition shows me the way to fly, and i'd forgotten it in favor of...i'm not even really sure what. so that some insensitive someone who wasn't paying attention to my polite "thank you but no thank you" could think better of me? wtf? i should know better than that. it was making me sick, afraid, discouraged, and really damn tired. so who cares about what they think? i'll follow the path that's right for me and i'll still get to where i want to go as fast as i want to get there, but i won't have lost any pieces of myself along the way...pieces that aren't a result of natural selection in the growth process.
on the flip side, here are my friends and siblings showing support for the Funkywild. just in case we forget, don quixote sings the Funk's theme song. well...one song of many...
the Funk's not back quite yet, but the unFunk is most definitely gone. right now's more the quiet aftermath and recovery after the storm of the unFunk. i do feel stronger and different; not quite sure what's different, but it's definitely different...
9.08.2008
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1 comment:
i've always loved that song.
i totally understand about feeling pushed in a direction that doesn't feel right to you. i'm glad you're staying on the right track - your track. love you.
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